Separation Anxiety

Please don't leave me here all alone. I don't like it. If you leave me, I'll start to think that you won't come back for me and that makes me nervous. So I'll start to cry and chew on toys. If I look at you with a pouty lip and puppy dog eyes, will you stay? Do you really have to go to the bathroom THAT bad?
Oh man. She's gone. Wah! Wah! Now I'll never get fed again! Waah! Waah! And, I'll have to wear this diaper for, like, ever. What's gonna happen when I poop again? I don't want to stay in a poopy diaper forever! Waaah. WAAAH! Good GOD! Somebody save me! Please! WAAAAAHH!
What? What's that? Oh, you're back. Good. Don't ever do that again or I'll make your night miserable lady. I mean it. I don't joke about things like that. I got family in Chicago you know. (evil glare).